Redefining My Identity
Have you ever had someone tell you that you can’t do something because you’re a woman? Have you ever had your decisions questioned because of your gender? Growing up in the world we live in now, it’s a common practice to have engrained into your brain that you always need to be cautious and to never go anywhere alone. With all these tactics programmed into us, no wonder I was so scared to go on this trip. But because of this trip, it has stripped away those negative thoughts from holding me back.
A little about myself, I grew up very lucky to live in a loving family that has cared for me very much and raised me in a safe suburban area. Even though we were in such a safe neighborhood, protective tactics still had to be repeatedly taught to me growing up, especially because I was a girl. These things included things that may be familiar to you if you are also female. Such tactics were things such as:
• to never walk alone at night
• carry your keys in between your fingers when walking in a parking lot
• hold onto your purse for dear life when out in public
• put pepper spray on your keys
• be careful of what you wear, it might give off the wrong idea
• never take your eye off your drink/let anyone handle your drink
• be careful of the strangers you talk to
This is the mindset I have had for the past 23 years, to live my life but make sure that I am cautious. Yes, it sounds crazy and paranoid, but it’s how I was raised. From this, I never thought that I would ever have the courage to go overseas. I grew up dreaming of seeing the world and experiencing different cultures just like everyone else. The problem, that I bet some of you have though is taking that first step to go from it being a fantasy to a possibility.
As a woman, I felt like my gender did sometimes hold me back from opportunities based on all the horrible things that you see on the news around the world. I wanted that to change, I didn’t want to live in fear anymore, I wanted to take a stand and learn how to take risks. This all began when a girl from my school came into my classroom before lecture and spoke about her adventures abroad with IBS in Thailand and Vietnam. I remember looking at her with awe and jealousy that she had done what I have dreamt of doing my whole life. From then I could never get the idea of that trip opportunity out of my head and the rest was history.
I remember as the trip approached faster and faster, there still that fear that I wasn’t going to be able to do it, that maybe I should back out. That fear is normal, and I want you to know that it’s okay to experience it. What you need to know is that YOU CAN DO THIS, no matter who you are, what your background is. This trip exceeds your limits and self-expectations beyond what you thought you were capable of, and that is one of the most rewarding things you can ever do for yourself.
Some background on me and my story to help inspire anyone that may doubt their abilities whether they are mental or physical to be able to conquer this trip. I committed to doing this trip in November of 2018 to go to the Europe 23-day seminar that departed in May of 2019. On January 10, 2019, I injured myself severely playing rec league sports and ended up rupturing my Achilles tendon completely. That kind of injury is one of the worst you can do as an athlete and one of the longest recoveries. I remember being in the emergency room before my surgery and the first thing I said was can I still go on my trip. They said I have the chance to be able to go but I may have to bring a walking boot with me and still may be limited, it all depended on my recovery and how much work I put into my physical therapy. Well 5 months later, I was able to leave for my trip without any support necessary besides packing many comfortable walking shoes.
What I want you all to know though, is to not let anything get in the way of something you are willing to fight for. With my injury, I didn’t know what I would be able to do on this trip, thinking that I would be extremely limited. But my experience was quite the opposite. I pushed my physical boundaries above and beyond what I thought I could do with my condition. On average we were walking a total of 5 miles a day and the maximum I did was 13.5 miles all over Paris. Before I left, the most I ever did was to and from my car to classes.
The International Business Seminar opens a lot of opportunities both for your education and career growth, but it also gives you the opportunity to grow into a person you never even thought you could be. Someone that is fearless, independent, strong, and proud of who they are and what they can accomplish. The old me is still in there but just helping push along the better version of myself that my trip brought out of me. Give yourself the opportunity to meet that person, I promise that they are worth meeting.